So I haven't posted for a few months because I've been wrapped up in FaceBook. There are so many of my past and present friends on Facebook and it has been fun to catch up with them. Needless to say, I have a hard time managing both FB and a blog. My friend James is constantly bugging me to update the blog so I better get on it!
Halloween was pretty fun. Daisha was some sort of fairy. Jaden was Elvis. Megan was a blue-haired witch. And Jace was a skunk.
Daisha and Jaden are big enough to just run off with their friends and they did just that. Megan, Jace, and I trick-or-treated with the neighbors. Jace, who was not happy with putting on his costume, thoroughly enjoyed Halloween this year! He was amazed that people would give him candy just because. In fact, if the people didn't lift their candy bowl up fast enough, Jace would just keep taking more until they caught on. It was very cute.
Now it's time to prepare for Christmas........
About Me
Friday, October 31, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Up the nose it goes!
Jace is obsessed with his nose! He constantly has his finger in it and it drives me crazy! Lately he has started to put other items in his nose. He was caught putting play-doh up there at day care. I've seen him stick dryer lint in there. I just knew he would be my child I would take to the doctor to dislodge some foreign object. I was wrong - sort of. I was at youth conference and came home to find out that David had to take Jace to the doctor - not me.
David thought Jace had stuck one of Jaden's air-soft gun BB's up his nose. He could see something was in there and Jace kept sneezing so off they went to the doctor. The doctor said it was not a BB but she couldn't tell what it was. What she did next made David question why he had to pay the $20 co-pay. The doctor closed the nostril that did not have the foreign object in it and had David blow in Jace's mouth. After a few blows, lots of snot all over David's cheek and a very upset Jace, a piece of uncooked macaroni came flying out of Jace's nose striking David in the cheek.
There is no permanent damage and if Jace sticks something else up his nose we know what to do and it won't cost us $20.00!
David thought Jace had stuck one of Jaden's air-soft gun BB's up his nose. He could see something was in there and Jace kept sneezing so off they went to the doctor. The doctor said it was not a BB but she couldn't tell what it was. What she did next made David question why he had to pay the $20 co-pay. The doctor closed the nostril that did not have the foreign object in it and had David blow in Jace's mouth. After a few blows, lots of snot all over David's cheek and a very upset Jace, a piece of uncooked macaroni came flying out of Jace's nose striking David in the cheek.
There is no permanent damage and if Jace sticks something else up his nose we know what to do and it won't cost us $20.00!
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Breaking Dawn is mine!
I have the final book in the Twighlight series! I got it about 12:45 AM and I am excited to read it. Daisha and I disagree on who Bella should choose; I want Jacob and she wants Edward. I just like the idea that Jacob is a little dangerous...of course Edward is too but only because he's a vampire and finds it difficult to control his desire to suck Bella's blood! Other than that, Edward is a wuss! He treats Bella like she's a piece of china that has been handed down through generations; never letting her do anything. Jacob, on the other hand, let's her live. Besides, Jacob is warm and cuddly - Edward is cold and shimmery! Jacob is the way to go!
Friday, August 1, 2008
Over-coddled Kids?
I thought this was an eye opening article because I have often thought that kids are over-coddled these days. I've certainly been guilty of it. Daisha and Jaden were not allowed past the neighbors house with the white fence - which is only about 500 feet from our house. Megan on the other hand, rules the nighborhood! And she is better off because of it. If we want to raise children with depth, character, kids who know how to work and get a long in the world, we have to give them wings and then let them fly! Too often we give them wings and the stick them in a cage. We teach our children their fears; fear is not a Godly attribute. I am now focusing on teaching my children to be aware, not afraid. But new moms have to learn this for themselves, just as I did! Tell me your thoughts....
Quit Coddling Your KidsPosted By Brett & Kate McKay On June 3, 2008 @ 7:26 pm In Blog, Featured, Relationships & Family:
I look around at young people these days, and I honestly fear for the future of my country. People are becoming less and less resilient and more and more clueless on how to survive in the real world. We live in a society of namby pamby men and women who whine when they don’t get what they want and think they are entitled to all the comforts the world has to offer. What do I blame it on? Bad parenting.
Baby Boomer parents developed a parenting philosophy that was soft on discipline and heavy on spoiling their children. Because many Boomer couples were both working, they wanted to make sure their children liked them to make up for the lack of time they were spending with their children. Generation X parents are even worse about coddling their kids. To many many Gen X parents, children are just an accessory you get to dress up with ironic t-shirts and fauxhawks.In an effort to stop the wussification of yet another generation of children, here are six ways young fathers can raise strong, resilient, and independent children.
1. Give them some independenceSeveral weeks ago there was a large brouhaha over a NY journalist having [1] allowed her 9 year old son to ride the subway home all by himself. Some people chastised the mother for putting her son in danger, while others wrote in to applaud her decision and to share their own stories of taking solo adventures as a child. I, of course, side with the latter. Kids can’t venture a half a mile from their homes these days without parents worrying for their safety. I live in a quiet suburban neighborhood adjacent to a middle school. Every day, SUVs line up down the street to pick up their kids because heaven forbid they would walk the mile home by themselves. They could be snatched!
This culture of obsessive over-protectiveness is bred by the media. As the 24 hour news networks and Satan’s minion, Nancy Grace, regurgitate stories of abduction over and over and over again, it begins to seem like the world outside your suburban castle is a very dangerous place indeed. Yet the reality is very different from how the media spins it. According to [2] Newsweek:Nationwide, stranger abductions are extremely rare; there’s a one-in-a-million chance a child will be taken by a stranger, according to the Justice Department. And 90 percent of sexual abuse cases are committed by someone the child knows. Mortality rates from all causes, including disease and accidents, for American children are lower now than they were 25 years ago. According to Child Trends, a nonprofit, nonpartisan research group, between 1980 and 2003 death rates dropped by 44 percent for children ages five to 14 and 32 percent for teens aged 15 to 19.
Don’t coddle your kids by keeping them under lock and key and only letting them out if you can keep a constant eye on them. You’re squelching their development and sense of independence. Teach your kids how to stay out of trouble and away from strangers, and then turn them loose to ride their bikes, roam the neighborhoods, run errands, and walk to school by themselves.
2. Let them do unsafe things“Helicopter parents” not only worry about their child being abducted, they wring their hands over letting their children do anything mildly unsafe. Everything today is childproof and fun proof. Have you been to a playground lately? Did you notice what was missing? Teeter-totters, merry-go-rounds, and sometimes even swings are going extinct, replaced by plastic coated, low to the ground, snooze inducing apparatuses. Some playgrounds even have signs that say “no running.” I kid you not. While these changes are often pushed by city managers worried about liability, parents are equally at fault in trying to clear any dangers from the path of their children. They fail to understand that while sticking kids in a protective bubble may keep them in safe in the short-term, it leaves them more vulnerable in the long run. Some lessons in safety must be learned from trial and error. If children don’t learn to deal with dangerous tools and situations growing up, when they finally leave the nest, they will be lacking in the skills necessary to negotiate the real world.
3. Don’t be their best friendI recently read an interview with Billy Ray Cyrus in which he was asked how he keeps his daughter Miley from turning into another Hollywood train wreck (this was before the topless pictures in Vanity Fair episode). He responded by saying, “I always try to be her best friend.” While many parents applaud such a philosophy, it is fundamentally the wrong way to raise a child. Parents want to believe they can be their child’s best friend because they enjoy such a healthy, close relationship. The reality is that parents want to be their child’s best friend because they’re afraid of their kid not liking them. But parenting is not a popularity contest. Being a true parent means that sometimes you have to lay down the rules, and oftentimes your kid is not going to like it. While “tough love” may be painful for both child and parent in the short term, it greatly benefits both in the long term. Kids don’t need a best friend, they need an authority figure. Deep down, they do want someone to lay down the rules and give them some structure. They want guidance. Best friends are equals, parents and children are not. If you insist on being your kid’s best friend, a situation will inevitably arise where you do finally try to reign them in and make them respect you. But it will be too late; they’ll feel free to toss your advice aside like they would for any friend.
4. Don’t automatically take their sideMy mom works at an elementary school. One day, one of the students was causing all manner of trouble: disrespecting the teachers, throwing tantrums, and antagonizing the other children. It got to the point where the girl’s parents actually had to be called to come take the child home. When the mom arrived, she gave the teachers the stink eye, turned to her kid and said, “Awww, you’ve been having a tough day, haven’t you Sweetie? Let’s go buy you a toy.”While it’s natural to think the best of your children, don’t be overly defensive when others criticize them. Teachers and friends typically do not have ulterior motives when sharing a story of your child’s misbehavior. As outside observers, they may have valuable insight into something about your kid that you have overlooked and need to address. Your child needs to earn your trust, just as anyone else does. Don’t give it to them automatically.
5. Make them work for what they getMany young people today are swimming in debt up to their ears. They feel entitled to the things it took their parents 30 years to acquire. Such a problem exists because many young people have never had to earn the things they’ve enjoyed. They expect the good things in life to naturally flow into their lives.If children are not given responsibilities and work as a young age, it’s harder to instill the ethic when they’re older. You’re doing your child a great disservice if you buy every stinking thing they want. Sure, it’s easier to just buy them the $10.00 toy just to shut their tantrum up. But all you’re doing is conditioning them to the idea that if you whine enough, you’ll get what you want.By encouraging your children to work for what they get, you’ll be teaching them valuable skills that they will carry with them the rest of their life. Not only will they develop an appreciation for work, they’ll learn valuable money management skills, responsibility, and initiative.During the early 1900’s kids were working 60 hours a week in factories and coal mines. While it was a deplorable situation, it shows that kids are capable of taking on far greater tasks than parents today are willing to give them. They may no longer have to break slate, but they can at least clean the bathroom and mow the lawn.
6. Don’t praise them indiscriminately“If everyone is special, then no one is” -The IncrediblesOne year, I volunteered at an after-school program at an elementary school. At the end of the summer we had an awards ceremony for the kids. The very PC director (no Pilgrim or Indian crafts on Thanksgiving!) insisted that every kid, whether they deserved one or not, had to receive an award, lest anyone should feel left out. So we were forced to think of awards even for the kids who had consistently misbehaved and caused trouble. Upon such students we ended up bestowing the “High Energy Award.” What a crock.What’s the point of an award if everyone gets one? What’s the point in striving to be your best, if everyone is equally rewarded? Praise then loses all of its meaning, even for those who really deserve it.Every parent believes their kid is special; that’s natural. But if you heap enormous and unwarranted praise on your kids, it’s going to end up debilitating them. Praising your child indiscriminately sends the message that praise is not earned, it is something one is naturally entitled too. It will end up dissolving their competitive drive. These children grow up believing they can do anything and everything well. Thus, they become restless at every job, quit, go to culinary school, then getting a masters in philosophy, and then think they’d like to try to enter the space program.
The reality is that there are certain things we are good at, and certain things we are not. If you praise your kids for everything, they’ll have a harder time honing in on their true talents and abilities. Instead of praising them indiscriminately, center your praise on specific achievements. For example, say, “You did a great job on your math test.” Not, “You are so smart and wonderful!”
Quit Coddling Your KidsPosted By Brett & Kate McKay On June 3, 2008 @ 7:26 pm In Blog, Featured, Relationships & Family:
I look around at young people these days, and I honestly fear for the future of my country. People are becoming less and less resilient and more and more clueless on how to survive in the real world. We live in a society of namby pamby men and women who whine when they don’t get what they want and think they are entitled to all the comforts the world has to offer. What do I blame it on? Bad parenting.
Baby Boomer parents developed a parenting philosophy that was soft on discipline and heavy on spoiling their children. Because many Boomer couples were both working, they wanted to make sure their children liked them to make up for the lack of time they were spending with their children. Generation X parents are even worse about coddling their kids. To many many Gen X parents, children are just an accessory you get to dress up with ironic t-shirts and fauxhawks.In an effort to stop the wussification of yet another generation of children, here are six ways young fathers can raise strong, resilient, and independent children.
1. Give them some independenceSeveral weeks ago there was a large brouhaha over a NY journalist having [1] allowed her 9 year old son to ride the subway home all by himself. Some people chastised the mother for putting her son in danger, while others wrote in to applaud her decision and to share their own stories of taking solo adventures as a child. I, of course, side with the latter. Kids can’t venture a half a mile from their homes these days without parents worrying for their safety. I live in a quiet suburban neighborhood adjacent to a middle school. Every day, SUVs line up down the street to pick up their kids because heaven forbid they would walk the mile home by themselves. They could be snatched!
This culture of obsessive over-protectiveness is bred by the media. As the 24 hour news networks and Satan’s minion, Nancy Grace, regurgitate stories of abduction over and over and over again, it begins to seem like the world outside your suburban castle is a very dangerous place indeed. Yet the reality is very different from how the media spins it. According to [2] Newsweek:Nationwide, stranger abductions are extremely rare; there’s a one-in-a-million chance a child will be taken by a stranger, according to the Justice Department. And 90 percent of sexual abuse cases are committed by someone the child knows. Mortality rates from all causes, including disease and accidents, for American children are lower now than they were 25 years ago. According to Child Trends, a nonprofit, nonpartisan research group, between 1980 and 2003 death rates dropped by 44 percent for children ages five to 14 and 32 percent for teens aged 15 to 19.
Don’t coddle your kids by keeping them under lock and key and only letting them out if you can keep a constant eye on them. You’re squelching their development and sense of independence. Teach your kids how to stay out of trouble and away from strangers, and then turn them loose to ride their bikes, roam the neighborhoods, run errands, and walk to school by themselves.
2. Let them do unsafe things“Helicopter parents” not only worry about their child being abducted, they wring their hands over letting their children do anything mildly unsafe. Everything today is childproof and fun proof. Have you been to a playground lately? Did you notice what was missing? Teeter-totters, merry-go-rounds, and sometimes even swings are going extinct, replaced by plastic coated, low to the ground, snooze inducing apparatuses. Some playgrounds even have signs that say “no running.” I kid you not. While these changes are often pushed by city managers worried about liability, parents are equally at fault in trying to clear any dangers from the path of their children. They fail to understand that while sticking kids in a protective bubble may keep them in safe in the short-term, it leaves them more vulnerable in the long run. Some lessons in safety must be learned from trial and error. If children don’t learn to deal with dangerous tools and situations growing up, when they finally leave the nest, they will be lacking in the skills necessary to negotiate the real world.
3. Don’t be their best friendI recently read an interview with Billy Ray Cyrus in which he was asked how he keeps his daughter Miley from turning into another Hollywood train wreck (this was before the topless pictures in Vanity Fair episode). He responded by saying, “I always try to be her best friend.” While many parents applaud such a philosophy, it is fundamentally the wrong way to raise a child. Parents want to believe they can be their child’s best friend because they enjoy such a healthy, close relationship. The reality is that parents want to be their child’s best friend because they’re afraid of their kid not liking them. But parenting is not a popularity contest. Being a true parent means that sometimes you have to lay down the rules, and oftentimes your kid is not going to like it. While “tough love” may be painful for both child and parent in the short term, it greatly benefits both in the long term. Kids don’t need a best friend, they need an authority figure. Deep down, they do want someone to lay down the rules and give them some structure. They want guidance. Best friends are equals, parents and children are not. If you insist on being your kid’s best friend, a situation will inevitably arise where you do finally try to reign them in and make them respect you. But it will be too late; they’ll feel free to toss your advice aside like they would for any friend.
4. Don’t automatically take their sideMy mom works at an elementary school. One day, one of the students was causing all manner of trouble: disrespecting the teachers, throwing tantrums, and antagonizing the other children. It got to the point where the girl’s parents actually had to be called to come take the child home. When the mom arrived, she gave the teachers the stink eye, turned to her kid and said, “Awww, you’ve been having a tough day, haven’t you Sweetie? Let’s go buy you a toy.”While it’s natural to think the best of your children, don’t be overly defensive when others criticize them. Teachers and friends typically do not have ulterior motives when sharing a story of your child’s misbehavior. As outside observers, they may have valuable insight into something about your kid that you have overlooked and need to address. Your child needs to earn your trust, just as anyone else does. Don’t give it to them automatically.
5. Make them work for what they getMany young people today are swimming in debt up to their ears. They feel entitled to the things it took their parents 30 years to acquire. Such a problem exists because many young people have never had to earn the things they’ve enjoyed. They expect the good things in life to naturally flow into their lives.If children are not given responsibilities and work as a young age, it’s harder to instill the ethic when they’re older. You’re doing your child a great disservice if you buy every stinking thing they want. Sure, it’s easier to just buy them the $10.00 toy just to shut their tantrum up. But all you’re doing is conditioning them to the idea that if you whine enough, you’ll get what you want.By encouraging your children to work for what they get, you’ll be teaching them valuable skills that they will carry with them the rest of their life. Not only will they develop an appreciation for work, they’ll learn valuable money management skills, responsibility, and initiative.During the early 1900’s kids were working 60 hours a week in factories and coal mines. While it was a deplorable situation, it shows that kids are capable of taking on far greater tasks than parents today are willing to give them. They may no longer have to break slate, but they can at least clean the bathroom and mow the lawn.
6. Don’t praise them indiscriminately“If everyone is special, then no one is” -The IncrediblesOne year, I volunteered at an after-school program at an elementary school. At the end of the summer we had an awards ceremony for the kids. The very PC director (no Pilgrim or Indian crafts on Thanksgiving!) insisted that every kid, whether they deserved one or not, had to receive an award, lest anyone should feel left out. So we were forced to think of awards even for the kids who had consistently misbehaved and caused trouble. Upon such students we ended up bestowing the “High Energy Award.” What a crock.What’s the point of an award if everyone gets one? What’s the point in striving to be your best, if everyone is equally rewarded? Praise then loses all of its meaning, even for those who really deserve it.Every parent believes their kid is special; that’s natural. But if you heap enormous and unwarranted praise on your kids, it’s going to end up debilitating them. Praising your child indiscriminately sends the message that praise is not earned, it is something one is naturally entitled too. It will end up dissolving their competitive drive. These children grow up believing they can do anything and everything well. Thus, they become restless at every job, quit, go to culinary school, then getting a masters in philosophy, and then think they’d like to try to enter the space program.
The reality is that there are certain things we are good at, and certain things we are not. If you praise your kids for everything, they’ll have a harder time honing in on their true talents and abilities. Instead of praising them indiscriminately, center your praise on specific achievements. For example, say, “You did a great job on your math test.” Not, “You are so smart and wonderful!”
Friday, July 25, 2008
Tradition
David and I had our first date at Liberty Park on the 24th od July so every 24th we go to Liberty Park to watch the fireworks. My BFF, Beverly, and her family join us too. Liberty Park has a decent show but it is more fun to watch all of the weird people...and it gets weirder every year. It's a good object lesson for the kids - this is why you stay in school. this is why you don't do drugs, this is why you dress modestly, this is why you don't get pregnant (or impregnate anybody) when you are just a child yourself etc....
Monday, July 21, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Whatever!
I love my job - at least I love what I do at my job. I get to analyze financial statements, post entries, present the financials to the owners and research questions. I also do payroll and HR. I especially love the HR part of it. My many years at my previous company taught me a lot about effective HR. Towards the end of my employment at my former company, I learned how an HR department should not operate.
There is one problem with my job though...I have no friends at work! Part of the problem is my position - I work a lot with management and people are cautious around HR. But a bigger part of it is political. My current boss came into the company at a time when major changes where happening and then he made even more changes - people don't like change. I feel like I'm guilty by association. People aren't mean at all but they don't reach out to me either. I've tried to reach out to them but don't have a lot of success. Today was an especially trying day and at the end of the day all I could say was "WHATEVER"!
There is one problem with my job though...I have no friends at work! Part of the problem is my position - I work a lot with management and people are cautious around HR. But a bigger part of it is political. My current boss came into the company at a time when major changes where happening and then he made even more changes - people don't like change. I feel like I'm guilty by association. People aren't mean at all but they don't reach out to me either. I've tried to reach out to them but don't have a lot of success. Today was an especially trying day and at the end of the day all I could say was "WHATEVER"!
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